Is that a deer in your Nativity Scene, or are you just trying to offend me?

I don't subscribe to political correctness, big shocker I know. Look, it doesn't take a giant brain to know when you are being rude, insensitive, or an all around douche bag. Sure there are some unintentional slights that might slip by us simply out of ignorance regarding particular customs etc. That being said, common sense and politeness are normally enough to get by on. So when I see idiots like this "Parent" raising a stink over Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, I can't help but comment, political correctness and sensitivity can blow me.

"Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer was almost grounded at Murrayville Elementary School this week after a parent complained about the classic Christmas song’s inclusion in her daughter’s upcoming kindergarten concert. The objecting parent was upset about the words “Christmas” and “Santa” in the song, feeling that they carried religious overtones."

This heart warming story comes by way of Murrayville North Carolina. I don't even know where to start. The objecting mother, who is Jewish had this to say,"“I don’t mind Christmas or anything Christmas-related at all, so long as you’re not imposing it on my child” She was also trying to get a Hanukkah song added to the program, pot let me introduce you to kettle. First of all Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer is not a religious icon. Having come from a long line of Southern Baptist's, Appalachian Snake Handlers and Lutherans, I can say with certainty that Rudolph and Santa can't be found in scripture. Jesus didn't ride in to Bethlehem on a sled pulled by reindeer. I need to back track here, there really aren't any snake handlers in my family, unless you count my gay cousin, Leonard, not that there is anything wrong with that. I would worry about insulting my 2 gay readers with that last line, but the Gheys by and large have a sense of humor and don't easily offend, unlike some Jewish mothers from North Carolina.

Christmas is not a religious holiday. Now that will surely offend someone, but it's true. We don't even know if Jesus was born around Christmas, some say it was August, or it never happened at all, and for you Atheists, don't even start with me. I'm Agnostic, so I hedge my bets. Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, whatever holiday you observe is just a commercialized over hyped excuse to spend more money on more crap. It's a time for children, and young at heart types to give and receive. Your faith, whatever it may be, is a personal thing, that I would assume you practice on a daily basis, regardless of the month. Trying to equate an antiquated poorly animated cartoon from the 60's to Christianity is , excuse me here, FUCKIN RETARDED !

What we have here is some moron who is insecure over her own beliefs, and possessing a paranoid certainty that she is being persecuted by having Rudy and Santa shoved down her throat, or up her overly tight ass. Maybe she thinks her kid is going to come home snuff out the Hanukkah candles, hang a crucifix on the wall and go in to full blown stigmata mode. The kid is in kindergarten, kids at that age believe in all sorts of shit that makes no sense to adults. It's like when the Christian Fundies got their prayer cloths in a bunch over the teletubbies. The one with the triangle was clearly ghey, children who watched the teletubbies were in danger of jumping the fence. Last I heard there weren't hoards of 5 year olds displaying Judy Garland posters in their overly tidy bedrooms, listening to Bette Midler albums and watching Broke Back Mountain over and over.

Which brings me to my point.

This lady isn't alone in her pursuit to be offended at the least provocation. People go out of their way to be offended or threatened. The most benign, innocent of things can set someone off, they sue, they protest, they march, the piss and moan, they rain on parades and shit in nests. If it isn't a cartoon character, it's a holiday, or any number of things that most of us never give a moments thought. Here's an example, the Iraqi guy who chunked a pair of oxfords at our buffoon of a president. Now keep in mind that shoe chunkin, striking, or slapping is like a supreme insult, it's the same as spitting in someones face. If we as Americans reacted in kind, Iraq would be a giant empty bowl of sand right now. This incident occurred in a region of the world where stoning a woman for back sass is acceptable. So mass extermination would have been totally acceptable under their line of thinking. But here, in this country, we see the humor in it. Who didn't think it was funny? By the way, W has some quick reflexes. My point is, people need to lighten up. Stop going out of your way to be offended, or to find some threat to your faith and beliefs. If you really believe what you subscribe to, then no mere onslaught of puppets or actors in fuzzy suits is going to shake your faith, or the values you instill in your children. Maybe it's okay to let kids be kids without heaping our own insecurities and self righteous indignation on them.

I apologize if I didn't offend any particular group. It certainly isn't my intention to leave anyone out. In this day and age, one can ever be too careful, and God, or not, knows I don't want anyone to feel like they are left out. So feel free to let me know if I've offended you by not singling you out. I've got a whole repertoire of "Your Momma" jokes, and I'm not afraid to use them.