MIDTOWN NOIR presents ...Dude Wheres Your Car?

I call him the ghost. I had been tracking him for months, always seemed to miss him by a few minutes. I spotted him on Broadway more than a few times, but I wasn't packing, no way to take a shot. The guy was elusive, always just out of reach. There were times I was certain he was on to me, playing Cat and Mouse with me. Still, I knew it was only a matter of time. Midtown is small, with dirty little nooks and crannies, like a midget hooker. Yeah, I know, they want to be called little people, and as soon as one of them can beat me at a game of pick up basketball, I'll start calling them little people, until then they are midgets. Like I said, it was just a matter of time, and I had plenty to spare.

It was Friday afternoon, the usual suspects were standing along 39th street and Broadway. An old man, probably 70, was shouting that Jayzus was coming. He was shouting really loud, yet people sitting at the bus stop , close enough to touch him, pretended he wasn't even there. He was waving a book in the air, I figured it was a bible, it wasn't. As I sat at the light the crazy guy walked closer, what had first looked like a bible, turned out to be a Readers Digest condensed novel. I guess if you're bat shit crazy, one book works as good as the next. While I was sitting at the light I decided to drive by a house I had seen the Ghost at in the past. It was my lucky day.

I found him. Call it dumb luck, chock it up to fate, blame it on a gut feeling, whatever the reason, the hunt was over. I had him in my sights. I clicked off three shots, and sped away. I had to do it, I needed proof. Nobody in their right mind would have believed me other wise.

Sorry for getting all Sam Spade on you. Truth is, Ive been trying to get pictures of this car for months. I never seemed to have my camera when I'd see it. If you frequent or live around here, then you have probably seen this car. An old guy that looks like Santa Claus drives it around midtown. He has so much stuff piled inside that the only open space is in the drivers seat. The ass end of the car squats under the wieght. It's a beautiful thing, it's why I live here.