Fast Eddie Friday...Fast and Loose,

This is only my second post for the week, I wish I had a better excuse than apathy and a shitty work ethic when it comes to this blog, but I don't. What I can do to make up for my absence is try to piss off and offend as many people as possible. I'll do my best.

Speaking of pissing people off, the people who brought us the statue of Liberty, snail eating, pencil mustaches, berets, and horizontally striped shirts, have proven yet again that we saved them from a life of speaking German and eating kraut, only to have them repeatedly bite us in the ass every time we turn around. The United Nations must investigate and clarify the dominant U.S. role in earthquake-ravaged Haiti, a French minister said Monday, claiming that international aid efforts were about helping Haiti, not "occupying" it. And there it is, another smarmy french prick complaining because we had the poor taste to try and help someone out. He isn't alone, Hugo Chavez is right there in agreement with him. When you find yourself aligned with Hugo Chavez, it's time to reassess your point of view. Considering the french once circled the island of Haiti with warships, demanding reparations for slaves they lost during Haiti's independence maybe French Cooperation Minister Alain Joyandet should make like a mime and shut his snail hole. We feed the world with one hand, while they busy themselves biting the other, frankly it gets a little old.

While I'm on the subject of Haiti, I might as well go for a double. Over the weekend, at least 3 of the local TV news outlets ran a continuous loop of a teary eyed group of white folks greeting some newly adopted Haitian kids, who couldn't understand a word they were saying, and were clearly more than a little freaked out over the news crews and strange white people who were passing them around like puppies.

Gee double M, that's a shitty thing to say.

Not really. These people were going on about how it had taken years to get these kids adopted, they chose to give interviews and parade these kids around, so they are fair game. Here's my problem. As best I can tell from the stats to be found on line, there were 10,000 kids in Missouri foster care, half of those were looking for permanent homes, about half of those were African American. In my mind there is something a little twisted in adopting a kid from Haiti, or China, or any country, when we have American kids who need homes and families. When you feel the need to show everyone the great humanitarian you are by parading around in front of multiple news crews with your latest dark skinned designer adoptee, while simultaneously scaring the kids shitless, it makes me think your newly arrived kids are more of a status symbol than a new family member. You want to be Brangelina, you want to show everyone what a great person you are, while ignoring the plight of similar children who were born and bred on U S soil, don't be surprised when some prick like me points out the obvious. I'm not saying they are horrible people, I am saying there is something fundamentally wrong when you go out of your way to import orphans from foreign soil, while we have an abundance of them here at home.

High school rivalries are nothing new. Even though I spent only a few hours inside the halls of Southwest High back in the stone age, I'm no stranger to the fierce dislike one schools student body can have for another. Eggs might end up being thrown, mascots desecrated, and an occasional fist fight might ensue. Word is that Hickman and Ruskin High Schools are going to be combined. Parents and students are none too pleased. They worry that there will be violence. Considering some student was caught with a loaded handgun at Ruskin last week, I'd say the fears are justified. Of course the parents and students are blaming the schools. Considering Ruskin has lost 1500 students over a 10 year stretch, bearing in mind that some punk was caught with a loaded pistol in the school, and taking into account that there was a major brawl between the schools last year, maybe the parents and students should look in the mirror. While the schools are definitely to blame in part for the demise of their districts, there is also a fair share of blame that should be taken on by parents whose children pack guns to school and have major brawls at sporting events. Much like the beleaguered K C school district, Ruskin and Hickman only share partial blame, parents who let their kids run buck wild need to take some heat as well.

Okay, I'm done. Have a safe weekend, see you back here on Monday, or Tuesday, or whenever I get around to it.