Alonzo Washington thinks Child Molestation is Funny

How's that for an attention grabber? Alonzo wants attention, I guess shit is slow in the Crime Fightin, tragedy pimpin biz, so he is fishing for hits. I normally steer clear of Alonzo's My Space page for a multitude of reasons. His writing is comparable to that of an eight year old dyslexic, in the middle of a grand mal siezure. My eyes hurt just trying to wade through his butchering of the English language. I'm no Charles Dickens myself, but I do understand the rule that you use A before words that start with a consonant sound, and AN before words that start with a vowel sound. His page also makes my computer bog down, must be all the flash greetings from the ghetto-tastic hood rats who send him sparkly roses, much love and shout outs in booty shorts. So I avoid Alonzo's My Space page like a hemophiliac avoids razor blades. Were it not for the widget on TKC, I would be blissfully oblivious to Alonzo's special ed musings. He took some shots at me over the Fox 4 interview, I let it slide. He mocked child abuse victims, I let it pass. he called me a coward. I let it alone. I figured gas prices are kind of high and he couldn't scrape up a few bucks to gas up his Smegma scooter, or Smegma mobile, so he decided to suck up a few hits through a blog war. I suppose he is still stinging from being taken to task by me, over vicious comments he made about a young murder victim. He even called the dead kids family liars. Classy.

Well, Smegma Man is at it again. I know, I know, his lame character is called Omega Man, but Smegma Man seems more fitting, plus he will have to look it up. Let's face it, Alonzo needs all the Cyferin Lessuns he can get. The offending post was classic Alonzo, here is AN excerpt,

"Anyway,the old school criminal blogger is a good person to talk to these guys. He was touched by a old man as a kid & was most likely done the same way while he was locked up. I pretty sure he was a prison ho because he appears to be a weakling with no heart to me. He is a coward like these new crooks because when he did a blog about a freak named Uncle Ed fear entered his heart after he got some threats. Plus, he is a loser who could never get any attention on without a blog. In the real world he is just a old, fat & ugly Ex-con". Classy huh? And he wonders why the local media shuns him more often than not. Why would anyone talk to some clown who makes jokes about a child being molested? Short answer, they wouldn't, and they don't. Alonzo is guilty of the same crime the feds popped me for, "Uttering as Genuine". I can sit up here all day, claim that I'm getting tips, swear I solved crimes, but that doesn't make it true. the truth is Alonzo doesn't get credit, because he rarely deserves it. He turned in a tip for the Precious doe case. That's a good thing, I give him props for doing it, regardless of his motivation. Beyond that, this guy has done nothing more than make baseless, unsubstantiated claims. He may have some people hoodwinked, but as a former slinger of bullshit, I recognize it when I see it. The reason Alonzo isn't of the same stature of say Alvin Brooks, is because he only cares about Alonzo. He calls the greatest advocate for the black community, a Tom. It's little wonder he is reduced to picking fights with bloggers he claims are nobody. When you resort to playing the dozens from your my space page, you are a failure at being the big time activist you claim to be.

Dayummmmmmmm, ouch! For a guy who is constantly going on, and on, and on, about how he is a Man of Gawd, just fightin the good fight, he sure doesn't have much compassion for victims of child abuse. To be fair, he probably doesn't grasp that making light of Child Molestation, regardless of the victim, is tantamount to ridiculing ALL VICTIMS, Alonzo isn't exactly an abstract thinker. And what's up with all the tough guy talk? I think those tight ass, funny style, wife beaters he wears are cutting off the blood flow to his brain. Or maybe the pound of hair grease he uses to plaster over his thinning wig, which rests atop his disproportionally large and bulbous head, have leeched toxic petrochemical products into his sub standard gray matter. Whatever the case may be, Smegma Man clearly hasn't progressed past the age of 16, which explains why he insists on calling me old, even though we are only 8 years apart in age.

So I'm faced with a conundrum here. Do I ignore Harold Penners biggest customer? Been there done that, didn't work. Do I take the easy cheap shots? Let's face it, the guy has no job, and more kids than a Mormon, so he must just live off his wife's earnings, and maybe some, ahem, Public assistance. In the world of insecure machismo that Washington resides in, living off a woman is kind of like pimpin. Then again, maybe he is making major cheddar from those comic book sales, or his action figure, a spray painted dollar store toy. Now I don't know that for a fact, but facts never got in Washington's way, so what's good for the goose. I could pull a couple hundred, quotes from his My Space page, truth be told the guy is his own worst enemy.

But cheap shots are a dime a dozen, and Washington has already been picked apart countless times. The problem is, he was just to dull witted to realize when he had his ass handed to him. I have wracked my brain trying to find a solution to this ongoing ankle biting campaign that Alonzo just won't let go. I think he is lonely, and jealous. His my space, heh heh, blog posts don't get comments very often. he thinks he gets mad hits, but fails to realize that the 1200 times a day he clicks on his own blog are all the hits he is getting. But I'm a nice guy so I'll let Alonzo ride my jock and send him some traffic. When you are a two bit attention whore, lack of attention is like a silver bullet. So show Alonzo some love, send him a glittering My Space rose or leave a comment on his "Blog".

I was going to challenge Smegma Man to AN Indian leg wrasslin match atop city hall, but he would have taken it seriously, and I don't want him taking that huge magic marker head up there. The wind might catch it and propel him like a hot air balloon. God only knows where he would end up. He might land in some third world country, where the locals might confuse him for a large wobble headed monster, and smote him with sticks and rocks. Besides, I'm not sure he can Leg Wrassle in those tight ass clothes he wears. So if you are feeling charitable, send a shout out to Alonzo, I think he is lonely in My Space land. Holla atcha boy , Alonzo!!!! Oh, and if you want to keep shit formal his middle name is Lanert, with a name like that it's no wonder he has more self esteem issues than an Old fat criminal blogger. Now I'll sit back and wait for his response, which will be a real hoot. In fact, let me save Alonzo his paltry dozen or so brain cells by offering up his response.

check this

a local criminal blogger is mad because I ....blah blah blah. He is old an fat....blah blah...i smell fear...blaH BLAH. i have many haters. they dont like that i am a angry proud black man, who be's fighting the good fight. i write this blog in my sleep. i right like I am 4 because it a method i use. i have a comic book and a car an a scotter two. That is why my haters be hating on me. there womans want me. When this blogger attacked me he was being rasisit. this criminal blogger is a nobody who will die soon bcause he is a old fat guy. i dont no why I has so many haters. I just trying to get tips and fight the goo fight. Blah, blah, and blah. This criminal says he was molested as an child. that is funny. he must be afraid of me. i am jus a man of god. i will knock him out. i has a ms pacman machine god blessed me.

Love Peace and hair grease

Alonzo Lanert Washington.